We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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