he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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