I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
