If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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