No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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