Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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