Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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