WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
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