I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
she smelled like a LAN party
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
