She's JV to your varsity
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
