But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
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