I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
her facebook's as public as her vagina
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
