Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
