Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
