I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
