New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
