I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
