You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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