remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
