dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
