i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
as a side note pls kill me
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
