I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize