Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying

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  (202): either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying http://tfl.nu/ahxy
  Replies (2) Good night (684) Bad night (1101)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?

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  (312): Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo? http://tfl.nu/uk9c
  Replies (33) Good night (3421) Bad night (3744)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"

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  (816): Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face" http://tfl.nu/0o08
  Replies (54) Good night (10974) Bad night (1918)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.

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  (616): I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse. http://tfl.nu/2ozn
  Replies (3) Good night (2174) Bad night (886)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.

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  (915): Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me. http://tfl.nu/qov1
  Replies (6) Good night (1267) Bad night (2627)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.

  (917): View more from New York City

  Please tell me you're talking about his personality.

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  (347): Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year. (917): Please tell me you're talking about his personality. http://tfl.nu/ofhy
  Replies (7) Good night (2501) Bad night (1340)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Solid. Can't put a price on good times

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You can and it's called a liver.

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  (386): Solid. Can't put a price on good times (978): You can and it's called a liver. http://tfl.nu/hzws
  Replies (3) Good night (1916) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza

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  (616): I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza http://tfl.nu/i05b
  Replies (1) Good night (1302) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again

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  (773): Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again http://tfl.nu/5np3
  Replies (2) Good night (867) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.

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  (303): My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/0900
  Replies (6) Good night (1190) Bad night (522)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.

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  (270): him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem. http://tfl.nu/ie18
  Replies (10) Good night (1821) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP

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  (240): Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP http://tfl.nu/rq2g
  Replies (0) Good night (772) Bad night (495)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking

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  (540): I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking http://tfl.nu/y8vi
  Replies (1) Good night (711) Bad night (464)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"

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  (601): I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny" http://tfl.nu/qm08
  Replies (2) Good night (482) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.

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  (541): Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low. http://tfl.nu/8hxe
  Replies (0) Good night (207) Bad night (245)

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