11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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