I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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