Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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