I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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