I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Randomize
