Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize