I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Randomize
