Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
