Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.

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(845): View more from New York

Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(613): View more from Ontario

I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games

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(443): View more from Maryland

And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks

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(503): View more from Oregon

Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.

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