Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
We are two peas in an std pod
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
