we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize