accomplished twins. life is a go
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
