My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
