How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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