Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
