What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
