U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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