Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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