Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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