Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
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