Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
either way he was missing a nipple.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
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