don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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