...so i touched it.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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