I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
