Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
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