I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize