Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
The ass gains better be worth it
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